Friday, April 5, 2013

Doctors Visit and a Trip Back to School

Hey all! 

Thought I'd give a quick update on today. I'm still fine pain wise and such and stomach still seems to hate me for taking that nasty liquid Ibuprofen and Tylenol but oh well. I'm not much a fan of anything that goes into my stomach these days. A good steak dinner sounds nice right about now, actually. 

So today, I went back to the "lovely" doctor's office to get a big check-up and I have another next week and it was really rather funny because I refused to smile. Why? Because it FREAKING HURTS! I found it quite amusing because the current resident surgeon or whatever was like, "I don't think she likes us. I think she hates us." And I really don't. I'm just trying not to laugh or smile because it hurts a lot and quite frankly, I'm not a social gal and I don't like talking to people . . . let alone trying to talk with a splint in my mouth. Which, according to my doctors, said it was put in too far back or something and also, my speech is different now. I don't know if it's good or not but they could tell I didn't quite care.

As for everything else, um, the doctor said I need to be brushing my teeth to be fighting infection because where the were closing the fistula in my mouth and where they made the incision to cut into my bone are pretty big 'cuts' and also, apparently, you can see bone. Which I find rather gross and I really didn't need to hear that. 

I can honestly say though that I hate going to the orthodontist and them though because of how NOT gentle they are with my mouth. I understand that they need to look at all of this stuff in my mouth but quite frankly, they are not gentle at all and they just yank my lips like I'm such rubber band that'll spring back after it's all said and done. NAY. And them having to lip my upper lip to look at my gums and my fistula wasn't fun although it was numb. I found it weird because it still hurt even though I was numb. I'm not really fond of it. 

Lastly, I went back to school to get some updates from my teachers and stuff to catch up on it all and lemme tell you, if you're going to get this type of surgery done or any major surgery done like this and you go to school (high school, college/university, etc) I would advise you to do it during the summer. It gives you time off to rest at your own pace. I'm not saying I'm not ready to go back or anything but I do have A LOT to catch up as I'm a student. Okay. I'll be honest. I'm a junior in high school. 

Anyway, it was okay to see people again but honestly, I feel self-conscious about the way my face looks these days. I don't want a lot of pity and I don't want people to start talking to me (mostly because I hate people and now I can't talk to save my life). I'm glad people were supportive about everything but I don't think anybody really gets what you're going through unless they've been there before and even then, people react to things differently so they still don't know how you're coping or anything.

After that, I got home and I was honestly EXHAUSTED from walking around for thirty minutes at school trying to say hello to teachers and stuff. It's not fun, let's be honest. :P I was dizzy and tired after that and I was surprised and I'm kind of even more scared to come back on Monday. People, especially in high school (more specifically my own) try really hard to feel sympathetic for others but sometimes, to me, it seems like what they're saying comes out wrong and it means nothing or it doesn't help me at all. They want to talk but honest to god, I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO PEOPLE! Gah! It's frustrating. I just want to sit and people watch all day and laugh silently in my own mind and just enjoy what I can for right now.

So yeah. That's my update for today. Nothing exciting today and I'm not sure I'm really up for a quote for the day, so yeah. 

Hope all of you are good!

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